I see several separate issues here;
Your aux. battery needs to be big enough to handle any accessories you plan, all at the same time. It is conceivable that wipers, defrost, headlights, radio, and ventilation fans could all be on at the same time, so plan for such things. The 12 volt aux battery is just a small buffer. It does not need to be very big at all.
Most of the upper amperage DC/DC converters from Iota have the option of two outputs, changeable by removing a plug. The plug only has two jumper wires in it, if you hook one of the wires to a relay, it is fairly easy to set it up so that the aux battery gets a 13.2 volt feed when the ignition switch is off, and 14.2 volts when the ignition switch is on. This keeps the aux. battery almost full, but gives nice crisp performance for turn signals and wipers, and nice bright lights for driving.
You should determine if you have any SIGNIFICANT parasitic draws in your car's system. The main computer (which stores information), the clock, the radio (to keep the stations and time memorized) all have a small parasitic draw. You can fairly easily determine how much this is so you can feel secure in leaving the EV for a few days without intervention, and know it will be reasonably fully charged when you need it.